When books are challenged or removed from schools and libraries, children often hear about it—from classmates, news headlines, or social media. As a parent, you have a unique opportunity to guide these conversations and help your child understand the complexities of censorship, free expression, and the value of diverse perspectives.
The goal isn't to tell children what to think, but to help them develop the skills to think critically about what they read and why some people want to limit access to certain books.
Age-Appropriate Discussion Suggestions
Children at different ages have varying capacities for understanding abstract concepts like censorship. Use these guidelines to tailor your conversations to your child's developmental stage.
Ages 5-7
Early ElementaryApproach Tips
- Focus on concrete concepts like fairness and sharing
- Use familiar scenarios (like classroom rules) as analogies
- Keep explanations brief and age-appropriate
- Reassure them that they can always talk to you about books
Sample Phrases to Use
- “Some grown-ups think this book isn't right for all kids, but other grown-ups disagree. That's why we talk about it together.”
- “Different families have different rules about what to read, just like different families have different bedtime rules.”
- “It's okay to have questions about books. I'm always here to help you understand.”
Ages 8-10
Upper ElementaryApproach Tips
- Introduce the concept of different perspectives and opinions
- Explain that people sometimes disagree about what's appropriate
- Discuss the difference between a book being "not for everyone" vs. "not for anyone"
- Encourage questions and curiosity
Sample Phrases to Use
- “When someone wants to remove a book from a library, it's called a "book challenge." People do this because they're worried about the content, but others think all kids should be able to choose what to read.”
- “Just because a book has hard topics doesn't mean it's bad. Sometimes books help us understand things we haven't experienced ourselves.”
- “What do you think makes a book "appropriate" for someone your age?”
Ages 11-13
Middle SchoolApproach Tips
- Discuss the First Amendment and constitutional rights in accessible terms
- Talk about why certain types of books are more frequently challenged
- Explore the concept of "uncomfortable" vs. "harmful" content
- Validate their growing independence as readers
Sample Phrases to Use
- “The First Amendment protects our right to read and access information. When books are removed from libraries, some people see it as limiting that right.”
- “Many challenged books tell stories about people who are different from us or deal with difficult topics. Why do you think some people want to remove those stories?”
- “I trust you to handle complex topics, and I'm here if you want to talk about anything confusing or upsetting in what you read.”
Ages 14-18
High SchoolApproach Tips
- Engage with them as developing critical thinkers
- Discuss historical context and patterns in book censorship
- Explore nuances: parental guidance vs. institutional bans
- Talk about civic engagement and their role in these conversations
Sample Phrases to Use
- “Throughout history, books have been banned for challenging the status quo. Many classics we read today were once considered dangerous. What does that tell us about censorship?”
- “There's a difference between a parent guiding their own child's reading and removing a book so no one can access it. Where do you think the line should be?”
- “If you strongly disagreed with a book being removed from your school, what could you do about it?”
How to Explain Book Banning to Children
Explaining book banning requires balancing honesty with age-appropriateness. Here are key concepts to cover and ways to address common questions.
What is a book challenge?
A book challenge happens when someone asks a school or library to remove a book. They might think the book isn't appropriate for certain ages or has content they disagree with. Not all challenges succeed—often a group of people reviews the book and decides whether to keep it.
Why do people want to ban books?
People challenge books for many reasons: they might think the content is too mature, disagree with the ideas presented, or want to protect children from topics they find uncomfortable. Sometimes they're concerned about language, violence, or themes related to identity and relationships.
What kinds of books get challenged?
Books that get challenged often feature characters from marginalized groups (LGBTQ+ characters, characters of color), deal with difficult historical events (slavery, the Holocaust), or discuss topics like mental health, substance use, or coming of age. Many award-winning and beloved books have been challenged.
Is banning a book the same as a parent's rules?
No. Parents have the right to guide their own children's reading choices. That's different from removing a book from a library so that no one can access it. One is a personal family decision; the other affects an entire community.
What should I say if my child asks why a specific book was banned?
Be honest in age-appropriate terms. You might say: “This book was challenged because it includes [topic], and some people thought it wasn't right for school libraries. Other people disagreed because they thought it was important for kids to have access to stories like this. What do you think?”
Reading Recommendations by Age Group
These frequently challenged books are appropriate entry points for discussing censorship with your child. Consider reading them together and talking about why someone might want them removed—and why others think they're valuable.
Picture Books (Ages 4-8)
Books that celebrate diversity and different family structures.
And Tango Makes Three
by Justin Richardson & Peter Parnell
A true story about penguin families at the Central Park Zoo.
I Am Jazz
by Jessica Herthel & Jazz Jennings
A story about a transgender child sharing her experience.
The Proudest Blue
by Ibtihaj Muhammad
A story about a girl wearing hijab on her first day of school.
Middle Grade (Ages 9-12)
Books that explore identity, friendship, and challenging circumstances.
George (now titled Melissa)
by Alex Gino
About a transgender girl navigating school and friendships.
The Hate U Give
by Angie Thomas
Explores racial injustice through a teen's perspective (also suitable for YA).
Drama
by Raina Telgemeier
A graphic novel about middle school theater with LGBTQ+ themes.
Young Adult (Ages 13-17)
Books dealing with complex themes of identity, social justice, and coming of age.
The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian
by Sherman Alexie
A Native American teen navigates two worlds with humor and honesty.
Speak
by Laurie Halse Anderson
A powerful story about trauma, silence, and finding your voice.
All Boys Aren't Blue
by George M. Johnson
A memoir exploring Black queer identity and coming of age.
Classics (Challenged Across Ages)
Beloved books that have faced challenges for decades.
To Kill a Mockingbird
by Harper Lee
Challenged for language and racial themes; explores justice and prejudice.
1984
by George Orwell
Challenged for political content; explores censorship and surveillance.
The Diary of Anne Frank
by Anne Frank
Challenged for content; a vital Holocaust testimony.
Before sharing any book with your child, consider previewing it yourself. Every child is different, and you know your child best. These recommendations are starting points for conversations, not one-size-fits-all solutions.
Tips for Critical Thinking About Challenged Content
Help your child develop the skills to thoughtfully engage with books and form their own opinions about controversial content. These strategies encourage reflection without telling children what to think.
Consider the Source
Teach children to think about who is making claims and what their motivations might be.
Questions to Ask
- Who is saying this book should be banned? What reasons do they give?
- Have the people challenging this book actually read it?
- What do people who defend the book say about it?
Context Matters
Help children understand that how content is presented matters as much as what is presented.
Questions to Ask
- Why do you think the author included this scene or topic?
- Is the book showing something bad to glorify it, or to help us understand it?
- How would the story be different without this part?
Multiple Perspectives
Encourage children to consider different viewpoints and why people might disagree.
Questions to Ask
- Why might someone find this book important or meaningful?
- Why might someone else find it upsetting or inappropriate?
- Can both perspectives have valid points?
Personal Reflection
Help children connect their reading to their own values and experiences.
Questions to Ask
- How did this book make you feel? Why?
- Did you learn anything new or see things differently after reading it?
- Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?
Distinguishing Discomfort from Harm
Guide children to understand that being uncomfortable isn't the same as being harmed.
Questions to Ask
- Did this book make you uncomfortable? That's not always a bad thing.
- What's the difference between a book being challenging and being harmful?
- Can reading about difficult things help us understand the world better?
Freedom and Responsibility
Discuss the balance between having access to information and using good judgment.
Questions to Ask
- Should everyone be able to decide what they want to read?
- What responsibilities come with having access to all kinds of books?
- Is there a difference between choosing not to read something and preventing others from reading it?
Conversation Starters for Any Age
Use these open-ended questions to begin discussions about books, reading, and freedom of expression. Adapt the language for your child's age.
- 1“Have you heard about any books being removed from your school or library? What do you think about that?”
- 2“If you could read any book in the world, what would it be? Should anyone be able to stop you?”
- 3“Why do you think stories about people different from us are important?”
- 4“Has a book ever helped you understand something you hadn't experienced yourself?”
- 5“What would you do if a book you loved was taken away from your library?”
Remember: You're the Expert on Your Child
Every child is different, and you know yours best. These guidelines are starting points, not rules. Some children are ready for complex conversations earlier; others need more time. The most important thing is to create a space where your child feels comfortable asking questions and expressing their thoughts about what they read.